Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Part 2: Birth Story - Anxiety

Since I am short on time these days, I am continuing my thoughts on yesterday’s post Part 1:Birth Story.

Since I had past challenges with early day bonding, the high emotional anxiety I was experiencing before even having baby number three made me very scared. My doctor strongly encouraged me to consider taking anti-depressants before the baby was born. This scared me even more. There is lots of research on the limited risks of anti-depressants during pregnancy and I do believe this could have been a good choice for me in many respects. Before doing that, I really wanted to explore other methods to control my emotions. So I made some changes to my life immediately. I really didn't have time to mess around. If I wasn't able to control my emotional stress before the baby came, how would I do it after the baby arrived? And these medications take time to take effect. So it was a NOW issue. No time to dilly dally.

I started going to yoga almost daily. I started transferring parts of my work projects to co-workers who would be covering me during my leave. I began seeing a massage therapist to help me physically relax. I rested more. I spent time alone trying to understand what was at the root of this stress. I saw specialist to discuss anti-depressants, the impact on the baby, the impact on me, the timing of the impacts, the plan for before and after the baby was born. I set up a plan A, B and C. I wanted options that were well thought out and supported by medicine. I wanted to be happy. I wanted my baby to be healthy. During this exploration, I found a lot of information on the positive impact for baby and mother to have a natural medication free labor. I was intrigued. Could this be the solution to the bonding issues? The breastfeeding issues? The emotional stress? I began to explore having a doula alongside me during labor.

With all of these factors in motion and more information in hand I was actually feeling better. I was feeling more in control. I'm not sure why control is so important to me. I probably need a lot more therapy to get to the root of that!

Hmmmm... More on this birth story again tomorrow. Are you bored yet? 


  1. I think it's important for moms to understand that we all struggle in different areas and try to do our best! More compassion is needed for each other. Thanks for sharing your story. I know I need to go to yoga but keep putting it off. Maybe on my free Saturday afternoons thanks to your tip! See ya soon!

    1. Laura - Thanks for your support. It is good to know sharing my perspective can be a little helpful to others out there. This is pretty personal stuff to share on the "interwebs!!"

  2. Hello Lisa,
    I am so delighted that you decided to be so transparent on that delicate subject. There is still such a stigma on dealing with our emotional changes during and after pregnancy- (Postpartum depression continues to be misunderstood and misdiagnosed)- and so many women are ashamed of their feeling or afraid to discuss them with friends and family. Everybody tells you that you should be so excited/ happy to be pregnant...
    Kudos to you for being willing to share your experience. It is very refreshing and commendable... I look forward to Part 3 :). Emma

    1. Emma - You are wonderfully supportive. I appreciate your kind words very much. Hugs.